For the past few months, Iāve been struggling. Not just with exhaustion, but with a deep, overwhelming heaviness. Some days, it felt like I was drowning in stress, responsibilities, and emotions I didnāt fully understand.
At the same time, I kept asking myself: What is the lesson Iām supposed to learn from this?
When Life Feels Too Heavy
Weāre in the middle of trying to sell our house so we can build our dream home. My husband has been working 80+ hours a week, and Iāve been juggling keeping the house āshow-ready,ā raising three kids, running between practices, meetings, and daily responsibilitiesāall while trying to hold it together.
I told myself, “I should be able to do this.” But that belief was crushing me.
The Moment I Hit Rock Bottom
It all came to a breaking point one day when the kids spilled milk on the carpet I had just shampooed. Don’t cry over spilled milk right?
I lost it.
I grabbed my daughter in a way that still makes me cringe to remember. I screamed. I told them to āGet out! I canāt be around you right now.ā
- My youngest ran outside and hid (he was 4)
- My daughter ran to her room and cried.
- My oldest (8) tried to comfort meāmaking me feel even worse because I told him to go away.
- I sat there, feeling like the worst mother in the world.
While I sat in a puddle of self-pity, anger, disappointment and regret. I’ve never felt so low in my life, I called several people for help, and no one answered. I honestly paced the room, wondering if I was going crazy, and how I would come back from it. I was scared. I cried for the help and support I was not getting. I cried for the life I was not living. I cried for the fear I was instilling in my kids. I cried for the way I was showing up. I contemplated just running away.
And then, finally, my sister-in-law called me back. She talked me through it and helped me find my way back from the edge.
The Hardest Lesson: I Waited Too Long to Take Care of Myself
That day, I learned a painful truth: I had ignored my own needs for too long.
I thought I could handle everything, but at what cost? If I donāt take care of myself, everyone suffers.
Iāve also realized just how much I numb my emotions instead of truly feeling them. This past year, Iāve gained a significant amount of weightāeven while being in a weight loss and emotional mastery group. Why? Because I wasnāt dealing with my emotions. I was stuffing them down.
My Body Was Trying to Tell Me Something
The signs were everywhere:
š¹ Ignoring my stress = Blow-ups and emotional outbursts
š¹ Numbing emotions with food = Weight gain
š¹ Pushing feelings away with āpositivityā = Emotional numbness
š¹ Suppressing resentment about responsibilities = Strained relationships
I kept fighting my feelings instead of allowing myself to process them.
Ā If youāre looking for a powerful read on processing emotions instead of suppressing them, I highly recommend The Untethered Soul by Michael A. Singer. This book helped me shift my perspective on how to not be controlled by my thoughts and emotions.
What If We Just Allowed Ourselves to Feel?
I received an email from a blogger I follow, and she was talking about this exact thing. She described struggling after the electionānot because of the outcome itself, but because she was resisting how she felt about it.
That hit me hard.
Instead of fighting my emotions, what if I just sat with them? What if I allowed myself to feel sadness, anger, disappointment, frustration, lonelinessāwithout trying to fix or suppress them?
What if instead of saying:
“Iām feeling something, letās fix it by eating something,”
I could say:
“Iām feeling something. Let me sit with it. Let me be curious about why itās here.”
The Truth About Being āFineā
Being āfineā is a lie.
Everything does not have to be fine all the time.
We donāt have to pretend weāre okay when weāre not. We donāt have to hold everything together just because we think we should.
I give myselfāand youāpermission to sit with whatever feelings arise. To stop running from them. To stop numbing them. To just feel.
If Youāre Struggling, Youāre Not Alone
Iām sharing this because I know Iām not the only one who has felt this way. If youāve been holding everything in, telling yourself you “should” be able to handle it allāI see you.
š Itās okay to ask for help.
š Itās okay to take a break.
š Itās okay to sit with your emotions instead of pushing them away.
If this resonates with you, I encourage you to take a moment today and check in with yourself. What emotions have you been stuffing down? Can you give yourself space to feel them, even if itās uncomfortable?
You are not alone in this. And you are allowed to take care of yourself.
5 Ways to Teach Yourself to Sit with Your Emotions
Sitting with emotions instead of pushing them away takes practice. If you’re used to numbing, distracting, or fixing, this might feel uncomfortable at firstābut it gets easier. Here are five simple ways to start:
1ļøā£ Breathe Through It. Instead of over analyzing how you feel, just sit and notice. Where does the emotion show up in your body? Breathe into it. Let it move through you instead of trying to push it away.
2ļøā£ Go for a Walk. Sometimes, emotions need movement. A slow, mindful walk (without distractions) can help you process and release what youāre feeling.
3ļøā£ Journaling. Writing things out brings clarity. You can use a guided journal with prompts for deeper insights, or just grab a beautiful blank journal and let your thoughts flow. (I love this one!)
4ļøā£ Meditation. If sitting with emotions feels overwhelming, meditation can help. Even just a few minutes of stillness can teach you to observe your feelings without needing to react.
5ļøā£ Morning & Evening Routine. Set yourself up for success by creating space to check in with yourself. Whether itās journaling, meditating, or just taking a quiet moment, a daily routine helps you stay emotionally aware instead of running on autopilot.
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