I’ve been toying with the idea of yoga since I got into the “self-help” arena. I know so many who say that yoga is a great way to connect to the body and to feel. I picture everyone in their cute outfits, chanting “ohm” and breathing. Changing position every so often. Feeling relaxed, connected, grounded and centered when you leave.
So my opportunity came. I met a mom of one of my kid’s friends…is there a name for that? You’re not quite friends, but you are by default because your kids are in the same class. Mom-friend? There should be something way cooler than that, because it’s a really unique relationship. Anyway… she invited me to join her after I talked my journey thus far and she asked if I tried Yoga. “No, but I want to” and this anxiety ridden day was born.
I have so many fears surrounding this. Will I be the biggest one? What am I going to wear. I’m not fashionable as it is, let alone workout gear. I do T-shirts and pants, and at this point, I’m spilling out of those. Am I going to squeeze myself into my “cooler” stuff and be uncomfortable, or die from wearing “covering” clothes. Such a delima. Will I be able to do the poses? Will people judge me?
My co-worker has been several times, so I interrogated her. This is our conversation:
Me: “um…so I’m debating about going to Hot Yoga…I’m scared”
CW: “I loved it, but you will need to be super hydrated, and ready to sweat through every item you are wearing”
Me: “I want to DO yoga, but I’m afraid with all the rolls that I can’t”
CW: “you can do it – you just have to do some modifications until you can do the poses more easily. the blocks help, and a strap will help too”
Me: “wait what? blocks and straps?!?! omg, I think you just made me more scared”
CW: “google it! NO – don’t be scared!!!!! the blocks help to let you hold the poses when you can’t get all the way int he pose, and the strap helps with flexibility”
Me: “whahaaha”
She talked me through some more neurotic issues about being the biggest person in there, and what I should wear. And I thanked her for talking me off of the ledge. I semi-obsessed about it all day, and earlier in my life, I would not have gone because I would have worried about how I would look. But one of my new found skills is to not let fear hold me back. So I went….
Me after Hot Yoga
We entered the room and it.was.hot but not 100 degree smack you in the face 100% humidity like we have here in Indiana summers. So it was comfortable. That was the first thing I noticed. The second thing was that I had shoes on and everyone else had flip flops, total newbie move. My mom friend got me a mat, towel, blocks and a strap. I was nervous.
Teacher: “Ok class, what do you want to work on today?”
Student A: “Abs”
Student B: “The peacock pose”
Me: “uhhh come again now?”
I was able to do most of the poses, but there were a few that I couldn’t do because my rolls, did in fact, get in the way. I am happy that I did finish and felt relaxed and loose in my body. I did not get the overall connected-ness affect that I’ve heard so many talk about. I think it was, in part, because I was concentrating too much on trying to keep up and get the poses down. There was probably 1 minute throughout the whole time that I intentionally connected. It moved really fast. I know all classes are different, but when asked if I like it my general response was “I didn’t hate it, but I didn’t love it either” The jury is out if I’ll do Hot Yoga again. I will try to find a gentler beginner yoga next time.
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